Nobody wants to go anywhere near a Note7

Yup, you’re stuck with it. It’s time to put it at the bottom of your freezer and leave it there forever, because no one is letting these things go anywhere.

Predictably, considering the Note7’s volatility, a couple of major institutions have said ‘Yeahhhhh, we ain’t touching that, bro’. Firstly, the US department of transportation has said it is totally banning the phablet from all flights into, out of or within the country. Or near the country, or on the same continent as it, or if it shares a planet with it. Basically, they want nothing to do with it.

Not only are they putting a “No Note7’s allowed” sign on all US planes, but anyone caught trying to sneak their flammable phablet in with their luggage will officially be prosecuted. Damn.

If anyone DOES manage to get the wannabe grenade on board, they’re basically going to be one metaphorical step away from Guantanamo. It’s not too hard to imagine the reaction being on a similar scale to this:

Also, back in good ole Blighty, the Royal Mail has said its drivers are having none of it too. The delivery firm has banned the phone from its couriers, as well as those of Parcel Force and its international courier firm.

We’ve had plenty of laughs, and awkward inhalations through gritted teeth, about these exploding phablets; and lord knows Samsung is feeling the heat (ha!). It’s time to put this saga to bed… unless Samsung wants to keep bringing it up. In which case we’ll oblige.